Sunday, June 4, 2006

True Love

Current mood: good

I have an announcement to make...a realization I fully came to today.... I LOVE myself..I absolutely Love who I am, and I would not change me for anything... I am done giving a shit what anyone else thinks...I am done trying to change peoples mind when I don't believe they are seeing me correctly... I am done caring what anyone sees... I know who I am.. I know what inside of me is good, and I know what is not my full potential... I know who I am more now than I ever have... This point in my life is so incredibly complex... Every day I feel like I am a whole new me... Sure, some moments get tough...sure there are times when I miss my ex (my baby's father)...There are still times when its all too much and all I can do is cry.. But yah know what, I even Love that about myself.. I love that I am not afraid to cry..not afraid to laugh...Not afraid to trust and not afraid to love... For all the hell I have been through in relationships..for all that has been wrong in them, and all the men who have wronged me.. I am still not broken, I am not hard, and I am not crippled.. But I am also not a doormat.. I have wisdom that is hard won.... I am real, and I know how to love (though I learn more about it each day)... I will sacrifice anything for the one I love..even my soul if it would've helped.. But I am not a pushover, nor a fool for just anyone..

I am so much stronger now than I have ever been, and I am grateful for all the lessons I have been given to learn... God knows I was a stubborn pupil at times..that I have cursed the sky for some of the trials I've been put through... but I wouldn't change a moment of my life.. I can only hope that I will be as amazing of a parent as my parents were (and are).. I hope I can give my child the foundation of understanding, and the solid base of proper values to build his or her life on.. I wouldn't be half the woman I am if it weren't for the basic lessons of love, life, and God my parents taught me... and so here I am..I am Me, and I LOVE me. Take me, or leave me, but you won't ever crush my spirit or break me... I don't like to quote scriptures or get all religious...But this applys in the spiritual sense that I mean it with that said.... "If God is for us, Who can be against us?" I love me..not because I am perfect, shit, I probably never will be... But I know who is with me..what it is that makes me strong. And I will NEVER lose that, and it will not be taken from me so long as I am breathing...

Currently listening:
Donnie Darko - Original Soundtrack & Score
By Michael Andrews
Release date: 04 October, 2005

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