Current mood:Brutally honest
Lately I've just been feeling so antisocial... Its not that I think I am better than anyone else, or that I am a bitch or anything...and its not that I am pregnant and tired...Its just...I am so tired of all the pretending people do...Most of us in the world can count the amount of people who truly love us, and vise versa, on one hand...maybe two if we are really lucky...the rest....yeah you might enjoy their company from time to time...or maybe not even...or maybe they are a friend of a friend you feel obligated to talk to everytime you see them...I am just tired of mindless chitchat with people who don't know me (nor want to know me) anymore than I know them... WHy do we bother with the "I havn't seen you in sooooooo long!! *squeal* how are you!!! hows the kids...hows the house...hows the job....etc..etc..etc... its such bullshit...most of those people don't really give a shit about you when it comes down to it... anymore than you genuinely care about them.... I don't mean to be harsh but think about this.... Get a random aquaintance in your head...now think about how you would feel if in 5 years you heard they had passed away.... be honest...you'd say "aww thats too bad...she was so young" or "wow, and she looked so healthy too", or " thats too bad, when did she die" and that'd be the extent of it...How many people would you actually cry and lose sleep over if they disappeared off of the face of the earth... Anyways...I feel like I am ranting...this is just something I have been thinking about... There are very very few people that actually matter in my life and they know without a doubt who they are...I can be nice...I can be polite, and if someone i know is standing in front of me i will gladly say "hello" , and if there is something of SUBSTANCE to talk about, than lets talk.....but I am so fed up with wasting my time (and theirs for that matter) "chit chatting" "BS-ing" and "shooting the breeze" with people who are irrelevant to my life..... If I am going to put the effort into verbally comunicating with another human being...why can't we talk about SOMETHING THAT MATTERS!!! for GODSAKE!! I don't care about the weather, or any other small talk....Its getting so bad that I have a hard time even pretending to care these days...I just assume walk away than be fake... Take it for what its worth...anyways, on that note..I wrote this poem last year at a memorial day party while observing the usual pretend "we're such good friends" bullshit dramatics going on all day.... Note to anyone who cares...IF YOU AIN'T GOT ANYTHING REAL TO TALK ABOUT TO ME...PLEASE DON'T WASTE YOUR (OR MY) TIME....SAY "HELLO" AND KEEP ON WALKING!
LIES
People mingle, exchange fleeting words
And unimportant lines of life
Same ole stuff just a different day
Same damn things still stand in your way
Uninspired
Float through life
Children crying, airplanes flying
Another man took a wife
Im still standing
Youre still breathing
Still floundering at our jobs
Your brothers still an alcoholic
My fathers still a slob
Meaning lies in hamburgers, chili, and at the bottom of your drink
Trying to forget the week that lies aheadmy appointment with my shrink
Bare feet trampling the green grass below
Segregated trios of friends exchanging the fakest hellos
Its been a long time and the honest truth is you didnt care, and neither did I
What is it about these party things that leads us all to polite lies
Do any of us really know another
Or just who we think they are
Are we known within the confines of our clothes
And recognized by car
Who got wed
Who split up
Whos dead?
Why does it matter to keep up on these words
Does it change MY life?
Is whats spoken even heard
Speak to me but this time Ill listen
With compassion for who you might be inside
Cant I know the real who you are
Lets all stop pretendingor say goodbye
 | Currently reading: The Natural Pregnancy Book: Herbs, Nutrition and Other Holistic Choices By Aviva Jill Romm Release date: June, 2003 |
No comments:
Post a Comment